Many grandparents spend cash on their grandkids – whether by chipping in on tuition bills, purchasing special treats or simply buying holiday gifts and helping with day-to-day expenses. Many seniors say that creating a financially secure life for themselves and their family is an important goal. As a grandparent, it can be hard to find a balance between supporting (and spoiling) your grandkids while ensuring you don’t run short on funds to reach your own financial and retirement goals. Here are four tips to keep it all in check:

1. Know what you can afford. No matter how much you enjoy splurging on your grandkids, your financial security should remain your first priority. There are many unknowns in retirement, including your longevity, fluctuation of the markets and the impact of inflation on purchasing power. Spend and gift within your means to maintain your own financial health in the future.

2. Determine if you’re giving or loaning. If you’re giving a gift, understand current federal tax rules, which are based on the calendar year. In 2015, you can give up to $14,000 to each family member before the federal gift tax is applied. And make certain the recipient knows it’s a gift for their own tax purposes, and so there is no uncertainty about whether or not they need to pay you back. If you are loaning money to a grandchild, be very specific about the terms and repayment, and consider having a written document that both parties sign and date. This can help safeguard your financial situation and ensure both of you are on the same page – now and in the future.

3. Talk about it. Many people tend to shy away from discussions about money and finances with their family. If you would like to help support your grandchildren or save for their future goals like college or a down payment on a home, be sure to communicate this with their parents. This can help your adult children do a better job with their own financial planning. For example, if the parents of your grandchild know how much you are expecting to contribute to their child’s education, they may be able to decrease the amount allocated to a 529 Plan and invest more toward other goals, such as their own retirement.

4. Establish boundaries. Even if you want to help your grandchildren financially, depending on their situation, it may not be appropriate to do so, or to repeatedly provide support. Everyone appreciates help, but if your grandchild needs to learn financial independence, there can be value in letting them live within their own means. Keep in mind the smart – and sometimes tough – financial lessons you learned as you made your own way as a young adult, and the pride that came with successfully overcoming challenges.

If you want to provide financial support to a family member, but haven’t incorporated it into your overall financial plan, consider consulting a financial professional. He or she can help you evaluate your financial needs and goals and create a strategy. A clear and realistic understanding of your own financial picture can help you identify how much you can comfortably give and stay on track with your own goals.

I have waited years for this to happen to me. Most of my friends are grandparents already and I’ve anxiously awaited the exciting news to happen to me. We all know that this is the crowning achievement of being a parent ourselves. No matter what else our own children do, how accomplished they are, how smart they are or how funny they are, it all comes down to this. THIS, my friends, means that you finally get to stop being just a parent. You can now be a certified GRANDPARENT. This is when you can stop worrying and stop being the responsible one. You can stop advising your own kids and gently (?) reminding them of what they’re supposed to be doing and simply ENJOY.

Yep, with a grandchild, you don’t have to worry about any of that. It’s parental bliss. Somebody else can do all the heavy lifting while you sit back and enjoy the good stuff. You get to spoil them, kiss them and hug them, fill their tummies with cookies and other good things to bribe them into loving you and then send them home for their temper tantrums, sleepless nights, and the number of other fun things we had to put up with as a parent. The time is near!

Wait… is that a worry?

Now that I know I’m going to be a grandmother, it means that my own child is going to have a baby. You know this is going to change their lives completely… will they be okay? It’s a huge responsibility, it’s expensive, will they have enough patience, how will they work it out with their jobs, will the dog be good with the baby? There are so many questions and so many worries. I thought this was supposed to be the easy part. Daily, I seem to be coming up with a whole new set of things to worry about. Granted, if worrying was an Olympic sport, I would compete and win the gold medal each and every time, but I’m sure that this is normal. The difference in being a parent and being a grandparent is that, this time around, I know what’s in store for them and I can’t do anything about it. I know darn well that they’re going to be great parents, but it is not going to stop me from worrying all the same. That poor little child is going to fall down and get hurt, he’s going to get sick, and he’s going to be unhappy sometimes; that’s a fact. Now, though, not only am I going to have to worry about my grandchild during those times, but I’m also going to worry about his mom and dad having to go through it, knowing how much it hurts them, as it did me, and not be able to do anything about it. How come nobody told me about this part of being a parent or grandparent?

I think that instead of landing on parent easy street, I just realized that I am about to embark on a whole new journey as a parent. I’m certain that I’m going to have my very own special relationship with my grandchildren, but am now realizing that I am about to have a whole new relationship with my own children as well. Being a parent really is a lifelong endeavor and becoming a grandparent is just another part of the same journey, with an awesome bonus.

I’m going to try my hardest to not worry about anything. I am going to spend lots of time with my new little grandson, cuddling, spoiling, and just loving him. When I send him home, I will give my own son and daughter-in-law an extra hug for all that they have to worry about now.